January 21st,

2002

The Assistant

Yes, I'm going to have a school schedule which involves Fridays, off. This will be great. I'll have an extra day to go on a weekend camping trip, an extra day to..

"Third floor for printout and payment."

..work and make some money, an extra day for service. And I won't need to drive to school on five days of the week. Four days sounds much...

"Third floor for printout and payment."

..better. I'm really enthused about the idea of finding a job and moving out on my own, but if such a thing were to wait until after this semester, I wouldn't be...

"Third floor for printout and payment."

..disappointed. There are several classes that I'm already enjoying very much, and looking forward to continuing.

This lady is great. She's talking quietly on the phone, obviously to one of her children, saying something about folding socks on the couch before dinner, all while being handed "DROP" and "ADD" slips, typing in numbers, handing back slips, and saying:

"Third floor for printout and payment."

While she's talking on the phone and looking at my "ADD" slip and typing numbers into the computer, and telling one of the other students across the room that what he's looking for is "on the other side", I tell her that "she needs an assistant".

"I AM an assistant," she says.

Laughingly: "this is probably your busiest day of the year." I say. Then she tells me that "no, I'm always busy, and if somehow you people decided to stop coming in here for an hour, they'd find me something else to do. It don't ever end."

The lady hands me my receipt.

"Third floor for printout and payment."

It doesn't take too long for me to discover that the workstation being used by a growing line of impatient students, is merely using an internet connection to connect with the university database, to print out the required statements, before they can be taken to the business office for processing and finalization. So instead of waiting in line like a dork, with all of the other dorks, I proceed to head towards one of the adjacent computer labs, intent on getting a printout, simply using one of the many vacant computers.

I pass by again on my way out of the building,...

"Third floor for printout and payment."

I pick up my new books and put them in my bag, walk towards the door and wonder where I would be if I weren't here..

"Third payment for printout and floor."